Is it Still Day 1 If You're Starting Over For The 100th Time?

After weeks of making excuses I finally got off my ass and went to the gym last night. I have been delaying this for a while as it marks Day 1 of my newest attempt to lose weight. I actually don't know if I am allowed to refer to it as Day 1 as I have started this process at least 100 times in the past few years.

This is a scary process for me as every time I have tried and failed I end up 10 pounds heavier than I was before and slightly depressed, then I go through a phase of self loathing.

See... I have never lacked the will to start working out or to start eating right... Starting is easy for me! What I have always failed at is the discipline to see it through. I start, I get excited, I go hard and then two weeks later a miss a day and a day turns into a week and a week into a month and the rest, as they say, is history.

As I undertake this journey my long term goal is to be a healthier version of myself and also 40 lbs lighter version of myself. I have not set a timeline on when I would like to achieve this just yet but my current plan is to take it all one day at a time, one week at a time, one achievement at a time.

Last night I went to the gym for the first time in over two months. I had a good workout but I struggled with things that should've been easier for me. It was a bit disheartening but if I must be real I couldn't have expected anything different.

So as I struggled through the basic exercises that Miss J gave me to do I kept thinking that I tomorrow I will be better, tomorrow I will do more, tomorrow I will definitely be better.

At the end of the session I asked for some advice on dietary changes that I will need to start making and here is Miss J's advice.

Foods to avoid:

1. Rice (easy for me as I don't particularly like Rice)
2. Flour (no more fried dumplings in the mornings)
3. Patty (this one will be hard) 
4. Sugar (replace drinks with water, lessen the amount I use in tea) 
5. Alcohol (good thing I finished that bottle of wine last weekend :)) 

This time I want real results, this time I want to see this through. I would love your feedback, advice and encouragement along the way.

Here are my starting stats... Let's see what these will be when I make an update on stats in two weeks!

Day 1... (for the 100th time) 

• Weight: 182 lbs 
• Height: 5ft 5in 
• Bust: 44in
• Waist: 37in
• Hip: 45in 
• Emotion: Cautiously hopeful
• Current Goal: Workout at least 4 days this week. 

~ Shermaine

The Bucket List Update- November 1, 2016

Bucket List

Back in August I decided to start a personal to do list to hold myself accountable for achieving some of the goals I set as part of my personal growth and transformation.

Since then I have not really completed much but in the months to come I intend to accomplish many of these dreams. Here goes my update...

Update... November 2, 2016

1.      Learn to drive (In progress… Currently getting lessons from Grennell’s Driving School)

2.       Learn to swim

3.       Explore Jamaica

        I.             Road trip to Portland with friends

      II.             Take the Black River Safari tour

    III.             Visit Jamaica Zoo 

    IV.             Climb Blue Mountain

      V.             Climb Dunn’s River Falls

    VI.             Visit Konoko Falls

4.       Read 300 books in 5 years (August 2016 – August 2021)

COMPLETED

        I.             Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki (Read August 2016)

IN PROGRESS

      II.             Failing Forward by John C Maxwell

    III.             How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

UPCOMING

    IV.             The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren

      V.             A Year of Miracles by Marianne Williamson

    VI.             Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe

  VII.             Little Gold Book of YES! Attitude by Jeffrey Gitomer

VIII.             Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Rich

    IX.             7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey

       X.             The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown

    XI.             Deception Point by Dan Brown

  XII.             Angels and Demons by Dan Brown

XIII.             Mary Higgins-Clarke (ALL HER NOVELS)

5.       Travel the world…

        I.             Brazil

·         Photo with Christ the Redeemer

·         Visit Ipanema

      II.             Curacao – Vacation

    III.             Canada

·         Experience CN Tower Edgewalk

·         Visit Niagra Falls

    IV.             France

      V.             Panama

    VI.             USA

  VII.             Turkey

VIII.             Taiwan 

    IX.             Italy

       X.             Japan

    XI.             China

  XII.             UAE – Skydiving in Dubai

6.       Learn to speak Spanish fluently

7.       Learn to speak French fluently

8.       Gain PMP certification 

9.       Marry the love of my life

What are your thoughts on my bucket list?

Are there any places or things you think I should add? Anything of particular interest in the places I have already added that are "must do's" for you when you visit?

I would love to hear your thoughts!

Til next time…

~ Shermaine Grant 

There Is Always A Reason To Smile... Be Grateful

It's 5:47am when I bolt out of bed and run into the bathroom. I have exactly 13 minutes before Mr Brown will call to say he is on the way which in turn means it's time for me to walk out and meet him at the crossing. I know that thirteen minutes does not seem like enough time for anyone to get ready but thankfully I'm a pro at this... thank's to 5 years of boarding school. 

I had not made a final decision on what to wear today and with little time to actually go through the closet I made a quick choice on a dress that has been staring at me for months begging to be worn... despite the expert advice of all my insecurities. 

I was sure to put my smile on but my belt, the lotion, and the make up bag were quickly thrown into the handbag as by this time I was at 6:03am and the "leave out now call" had already come. 

I got to work at 6:50am today, stopped at my desk,  then went to the restroom to "put on my face". If you know me at all, you know that this is a very rare occurrence for me, not necessarily because I don't like make up but because I don't think it's necessary for everyday use and well... I can't really use it very well. 

So after about 10 minutes could've been 20 or 30 but who's counting in the restroom I emerged with an even bigger smile than before and more than a little pep in my step. 

Smile honey... you are truly beautiful 

Of course my insecurities being the experts that they are have been whispering the reminders of the love handles and the "big belly" that are showing which then led to the inclusion of a scarf in the outfit to distract from such flaws... but the smile remained the same :).

As I keep smiling today I am reminded of my recent decision to live a more positive life through gratitude and purpose. So today, once again, I am grateful...

I am grateful for life.
I am grateful for my family and friends.
I am grateful for new opportunities and new adventures.
I am grateful for perceived missed opportunities and the dangers from which I have been spared as a result of them.

And today in particular I am especially grateful for all the persons who will look at me with or without shock (depending on whether or not you know me) then tell me that I look Georgeous, or Nice, or Beautiful, or Stunning or any variation of those words...

My self confidence thanks you all in advance!


With Love,
Shermaine Grant

The Bucket List - October 10, 2016

Back in August I decided to start a personal to do list to hold myself accountable for achieving some of the goals I set as part of my personal growth and transformation.

Since then I have only completed one item but I have added some more details to the list... 

Update... October 10, 2016

1.     Learn to drive 

2.     Learn to swim

3.     Road trip to Portland with friends

4.     Take the Black River Safari tour

5.     Visit Jamaica Zoo 

6.     Climb Blue Mountain

7.     Read 300 books in 5 years (August 2016 – August 2021)

·         Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki (Read August 2016)

·        The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren

·        A Year of Miracles by Marianne Williamson

·        Failing forward by John C Maxwell

8.     Travel the world

·        Curacao – Vacation

·        Canada

o   Experience CN Tower Edgewalk

o   Visit Niagra Falls

·        London

·        France

·        Panama

·        USA

·        Turkey

·        UAE – Skydiving in Dubai

9.      Learn to speak Spanish fluently

10. Learn to speak French fluently

11. Gain PMP certification 

Keep in touch for updates...

-Shermaine Grant 

THE POSITIVE DIFFERENCE

Reblogged from greatday.com .. Because I cannot start my day without Ralph

Be the positive difference

by Ralph Marston

Hope shines brightest in hopeless situations. Optimism is the most powerful when there is no obvious reason for it.

If you’re not pleased with the way things are, that’s no excuse to be dejected. It is an opportunity to make a difference, to be the difference.

Your inner direction does not have to be dictated by the way things are. You can choose to be driven, motivated, inspired by your highest vision for life.

It’s all too easy to let go of your vision, to claim the world is pushing you down. What’s much better is finding a way to live that vision in every moment no matter the circumstance.

Sure, there are obstacles to overcome. The way to get past them is with a strong, non-negotiable, positive vision.

Let your highest and best vision drive you. And be the positive difference you know you can be.

© 2016 Ralph S. Marston, Jr.
From The Daily Motivator website at http://greatday.com/motivate/161007.html

One Moment In Time...

Whitney Houston's One Moment In Time is the song on my heart this morning...

Because sometimes all we need in life is that one moment...

A moment to remind ourselves that where we are now is not where we will always be.
A moment to reflect on all the things we want to do and all the places we want to see.
A moment to believe that our dreams are valid even if no one else will ever understand.
A moment to determine how far we are willing to go and what we are willing to withstand...

Because sometimes all we need in life if that one moment in time...

~Shermaine Grant

Trust The Timing of Everything...

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, nothing happens before its time and "what is fi yuh cannot be un fi yuh"**.

This is a lesson I learnt from my mother while I was in high school and it has guided the way I have lived my life since.

See... I attended the Westwood High School in Stewart Town Trelawny from 2001-2006. While the school prided itself on equality and non discrimination regardless of class, colour or creed the general impression was still that only the children of the rich that attended this "expensive" but extremely good all girls boarding school.

If you know me, you know that where I am from in St Ann is the definition of rural Jamaica and my parents are the definition of humble beginnings. During my Westwood Sojourn my mother was a dressmaker, a farmer and in my eyes a magician while my father was a construction worker in Kingston... Clearly not the profile of the average Westwood Student. But I was born to defy odds.

Many persons thought my mother was crazy to be sending me to this school and some even criticized her decision saying she was "hanging her basket where she can't reach it"**. But my mother had a dream for me that she was determined to see through even if no one else could see her dream too and that meant sacrifices became her way of life.

Westwood depended on their boarding fees to keep the programme running as this was not funded by the Government, so naturally the policy was that fees are expected to be paid at the beginning of each school term. Of course my mother went in and made alternate arrangements with the burser and principal to divide each term's fee in 4. So other parents got three vouchers per year, my mother got 12. That for her was a much easier way of paying the bills than trying to find a lump sum.

On one occasion my mother mother just simply did not have the money for my school fees and the deadline was fast approaching. Feeling helpless she remembered that my aunt had once told her that if she ever needed any help she should reach out, so she did.

She bought herself some credit (out of the already limited funds she had) so she could make a long distance call and got in touch with my aunt. She explained the situation to her and asked for a loan to help cover the costs.

She was sure my aunt would send her even US $50 as that would cover what she needed (the Jamaican dollar valued a lot more back then US $50 would have valued about JMD $4000 at the time).

To her surprise however my aunt did not give her the loan, instead she told her "don't worry Sister Joy, God is an on-time God and he will come through for you" 

My mother was disappointed but not disheartened. The loan was not to be but she still had a deadline to meet and a daughter depending on her. With that in mind she put her water boots on, picked up her cutlass and headed for her bush (farm).

She had a crop of cabbage that she had begun reaping the week before and although common sense told her there would be nothing there to find she decided she still had to try.

Miraculously she found more cabbage than she could carry on her own and ended up having to borrow a donkey from another farmer to transport the produce to the shop where she would sell it to one of the market vendors.

With that she was able to pay my school fees and have some money left over to take care of some other business at home. The best part of it all was that she did not have to pay that money back to anyone.

She had called my aunt asking for help via a loan but the help she got was much more valuable; a reminder that God is an on-time God and He always comes through"

My mother did not immediately share this story with me, mostly because she did not want me to worry about the finances but I will forever be grateful that she eventually did as this story deepened my faith in God.

Lesson learnt:
Trust the timing of everything. Just because its not happening right now doesn't mean it never will. God is an on-time God.

**"What is fi yuh can not be un fi yuh" - Jamaican saying that means if it is your destiny nothing can stop it from happening.

**"hanging her basket where she can't reach it" - Jamaican saying that means one is living above their means.

- Shermaine Grant

What Will Your Legacy Be?

When that day comes, when you shall have left this world, what will you have left behind?

Will you have lived your best life? Will you have touched someone's life? Will you have made a difference? Will you have legacy that will live on?

Beyonce's I was Here is by far my favourite song and it is a constant reminder to me to live, to love, to do and to be. I've spent many years being paralyzed by a fear of the unknown and taking few risks but with each day I now try to make me a little better, a little braver and a little wiser so I can make a difference in the lives of everyone I come in contact with.

If for any reason God should decide that he is ready for me soon I want to be able to smile in my final moments and say "I Was Here!"

Check out the lyrics and video below of my favourite performance of this song by Beyonce (United Nations World Humanitarian Day August 19, 2012).

When I need a pick me up at work or even at home I watch this performance to remind myself that I am here for a greater purpose. there is more to life than my current limitations and one day I will look back on this very situation and smile knowing that I Was Here

I Was Here...

Artist: Beyonce 

I wanna leave my footprint on the sands of time.

Know there was something that, meant something that I left behind. 
When I leave this world, I'll leave no regrets, 
Leave something to remember, so they won't forget
I was here...

I lived, I loved
I was here...
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be.
I will leave my mark so everyone will know
I was here

I wanna say I lived each day until I die  
And know that I meant something in somebody's life
The hearts I have touched will be the proof that I leave
That I made a difference, and this world will see
I was here...

I lived, I loved
I was here
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know
I was here  I lived, I loved
I was here
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know
I was here

I just want them to know  That I gave my all, did my best
Brought someone to happiness
Left this world a little better just because
I was here 

I was here  I lived, I loved
I was here
I did, I've done, everything that I wanted
And it was more than I thought it would be
I will leave my mark so everyone will know
I was here.

I lived (I lived), I loved
I was hereI did, I did (I've done), 
I was here
I lived, I loved
I was here
I did, I've done

I was here...

Keep in touch and I'll keep you posted on my progress!

- Shermaine Grant

Think it into being...

My coworker saw me in the hallway earlier and told me that I look happy. 

It took me a moment to process what she said as those are not words I have heard for a very long time now. I've gotten very accostumed to hearing that I look stressed or tired but not happy.

Well... Thank you Tashna, you just made my week! :) 

I have spent much of this week focusing on my blessings after making a concerted effort to stop complaining and it seems it it working out for me after-all... 

Cogito ergo sum... I think therefore I am.

- Shermaine 

Adulting makes it so hard to dream...

Do you remember the life your 10 year old self dreamt you would have by the time you were 25?

All the places you wanted to go... all the people you wanted to meet... all the adventures you were sure you would undertake? 

How is that life going for you now?

Well if you are like me, your 10 year old self would likely be a little disappointed with where you currently are. To be perfectly honest even your 26 year old self may not be so pleased right now... 

It's disheartening and sometimes even a little depressing as the reality continues to hit that you are an adult and some dreams are just that... dreams! With all the responsibilities and demands faced daily you tend to forget  what a beauty life can be and instead dwell in a place of regret, second guessing and self pity.

This place would be where I resided for the past few weeks. As the challenges of my job and my responsibilities at home became increasingly overbearing I spent my days being miserable. Angry at the world and wondering why me. 

I started to watch everyone else around me who all suddenly seemed to have life under control; travelling, frolicking and having fun. Meanwhile I'm struggling to pay bills and stay afloat until the next pay check.

I have realized that there is a problem here.. but that problem is not with the world. That problem is with my view of the world. I have forgotten how to dream, how to believe and the true power of faith.

So today I accept that I have a problem... I have stopped dreaming and this is simply unacceptable.

What shall I do to fix this?

Stay tuned and find out...

- Shermaine Grant

The Bucket List - August 2, 2016

I often get so caught up in survival that I forget to live, to dream, to have faith...

As a part of my personal growth and transformation I've decided to start a personal to do list, a bucket list of sorts, to remind myself of some of the experiences that I want.

So here goes my first attempt at publishing a bucket list.

August 2, 2016

1. Learn to drive 
2. Learn to swim
3. Road trip to Portland 
4. Black River Safari 
5. Jamaica Zoo 
6. Climb Blue Mountain 
7. Skydiving 
8. Read 300 books 
9. Visit at least 20 countries before I'm 45
10. TBC

Now let's see how soon I can achieve these and what else will be added to the list as time goes by.

Stay tuned for monthly updates... 

-Shermaine Grant 

Positive Thoughts... Positive Life

"Get in the habit of listing all the reasons why you can, why you will, and why you must. Then get busy, for where your thoughts lead, your life will surely follow."

~ Ralph Marston